rai_ryu: (Badman)
This is my first post directly on Dreamwidth, and I'm wasting it on this survey instead of actually writing stuff! Ha Ha Ha

01:When did you first start writing?
I remember actually beginning to write stuff in grade 4 or 5.

02:What was your favorite book growing up?
Go Dog Go (when I was very young), then Into The Land of the Unicorns by Bruce Coville, and The Dark Is Rising by Susan Cooper (these are still on my list of favourite books)

03:Are you an avid reader?
I'd say so! Although HOW "avid" depends on what I'm reading - if it's really dull, I tend to try and avoid it.

04:Have you ever thrown a book across the room?
I wouldn't say across the ROOM. I've definitely thrown a book down on the bed, and shoved a pillow over it for good measure. Writers are the worst sometimes.

05:Did you take writing courses in school/college?
I took creative writing in highschool, which had a lot less fiction than you'd expect. Then I took a business writing course in college, cause it was required.

06:Have you read any writing-advice books?
Yes, I had to for an assignment once. They are as such:
The 28 Biggest Writing Blunders (And How to Avoid Them)
This one wasn't bad, but most of the blunders were things I would never have tried to do, or things I already knew.
Self-Editing for Fiction Writers: How to Edit Yourself Into Print
I enjoyed reading it and it had a lot of excerpts from good books. I don't... actually remember much of it's advice though because I read it so long ago ^^'

07:Have you ever been part of a critique group?
Not really. I feel like a lot of times when people try to start "critique groups" what they really mean is "I want someone to critique my novel but I don't want to read/critique other people's writing", so the group soon falls apart.

08:What’s the best piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten?
"It seems more like a Western than a Fantasy"
I can't say if this is really the BEST piece, but I think it's the sort of thing I'm looking for. If I'm really missing the mark I want to be aware. And my first reaction was to think "Of course it's fantasy, just wait until the end of the novel when someone becomes immortal!" But then over the years I started to think, if it's not obvious from the beginning then everything's gonna look out of place. I need to find a way to work magic into the world before the last chapter.

09:What’s the worst piece of feedback you’ve ever gotten?
"IT'S PERFECT DON'T CHANGE ANYTHING"

10:What’s your biggest writer pet-peeve?
Weirdly specific description, obligatory romance.

11:What’s your favorite book cover?
Uhg, there's so many that I like!
The first cover of Unspoken by Sarah Rees Brennan is beautiful, as are the UK covers of her Demon's Lexicon trilogy. I really like the covers of the Eternal Sky trilogy by Elizabeth Bear. And there's a special mention to Black Helicopters by Caitlin R. Kiernan. (I've probably left out something lovely!)

12:Who is your favorite author?
Tamora Pierce, Sarah Rees Brennan, Scott Lynch, Kenneth Oppel, Caitlin R. Kiernan.

13:What’s your favorite writing quote?
I can't think of any off the top of my head, but probably just something simple like "Writer's Write".

14:What’s your favorite writing blog? c;
I like to follow the blogs of authors like Sarah Rees Brennan, Malinda Lo and Elizabeth Bear. They're not exactly "writing blogs" but they provide insight sometimes, to how different writers do things.

15:What would you say has inspired you the most?
Being very lonely and having ample time to use my imagination.

16:How do you feel about movies based on books?
Usually... they're not good. Or not AS good. But my favourite book was turned into the Worst Movie Ever, so I'm very bitter.

17:Would you like your books to be turned into TV shows, movies, video games, or none?
I don't really know if they would work as such. Although, the story I'm working on now would make an interesting video game, I think.

18:How do you feel about love triangles?
They're so tiring and overdone! Even if someone tries to do like, a subversion of one, it tires me out right away.

19:Do you prefer writing on a computer or longhand?
I used to prefer writing by hand, but I have wrist problems so now I have to type everything out.

20:What’s your favorite writing program?
I just use MS word, ahah

21:Do you outline?
It looks like I tend to outline AFTER my first draft.

22:Do you start with characters or plot?
Almost always, it's characters. I have a lot of characters that I don't yet have a plot for.

23:What’s your favorite & least favorite part of making characters?
I like backstories and figuring out why characters act like they do, and how they'd respond to certain things. I dislike finding the "little things" about a character - if I look for them, they seem forced, if I don't look, they might not show up.

24:What’s your favorite & least favorite part of plotting?
My favourite part is when things all fit together, my least favourite part is MAKING THINGS ALL FIT TOGETHER. And also trying to figure out if things are "believable"

25:What advice would you give to young writers?
Edit AFTER you write.

26:Which do you enjoy reading the most: physical, ebook, or both?
Physical books. Ebooks don't feel real to me, and screens are hard to pay attention to.

27:Which is your favorite genre to write?
Fantasy.

28:Which do you find hardest: the beginning, the middle, or the end?
I usually start off with an ending in mind. Maybe I'll have a beginning scene. But I always have to really work to connect them together.

29:Which do you find easiest: writing or editing?
I actually enjoy editing, but it always leads to more writing anyway. Editing is definitely less frightening than writing.

30:Have you ever written fan-fiction?
Yes, and it was not good.

31:Have you ever been published?
A couple of short stories.

32:How do you feel about friends and close relatives reading your work?
Friends can read it, relatives are embarrassing because I always feel like they'll look for a hidden message in what I'm writing.

33:Are you interested in having your work published?
I'd like to.

34:Describe your writing space.
It's my bed... which is apparently a bad place to do it :P

35:What’s your favorite time of day for writing?
Mid-day or at night, I think.

36:Do you listen to music when you write?
Sometimes - but it needs to fit the mood of things.

37:What’s your oldest WIP?
I started it in 5th grade and I'm going to re-write for the 4th time this November.

38:What’s your current WIP?
"current" haha. Well, it's a sci-fi story (trilogy) that I've been working on for the past few NaNoWriMos. I've also got another short sci-fi story that I'm working on. I mostly have it written out but I need to re-write some scenes to fit the mood.

39:What’s the weirdest story idea you’ve ever had?
There's probably been weirder but "eccentric millionaire builds and android and wipes his memory, gets him addicted to drugs, and watches him suffer for fun". Why??????

40:Which is your favorite original character, and why?
I like them all and they all have a special place in my heart!!
But I do really like my roleplay characters and I feel like I've done a lot of work with them and they've got all those little character details down.

41:What do you do when characters don’t follow the outline?
See if where they're going is better than my first idea.

42:Do you enjoy making your characters suffer?
In some ways yes, in some ways no. I feel like suffering can become a bit too much. However, in my current novels, the main character gets injured a LOT, and I enjoy that.

43:Have you ever killed a main character?
I don't actually think I have. I don't think you need to, or at least, I've never needed to.

44:What’s the weirdest character concept you’ve ever come up with?
Uh, I feel like I have a lot, but there's one that I don't even know what I was thinking... "Alien crash lands on earth and is taken in by a priest who makes him a religious zealot". But also "Anthropomorphised drafting compass that has a genetic disorder which causes her to murder people uncontrollably". I'm sure there have been even stranger than that.

45:What’s your favorite character name?
In fiction, I really enjoy the name "Scarborough Pentecost" from Caitlin R. Kiernan's Threshold.
Of my own, I like the classic "Carmine Red", but I'm currently enjoying "Lambda" (I mean, it's a code name, but still).

46:Describe your perfect writing space.
Maybe like a futon, something that offers lots of different seating arrangements. I like sunny places in general and places with lots of plants. Mostly I just need a space where I can write comfortably on a laptop so that I don't completely kill my wrists.

47:If you could steal one character from another author and make then yours, who would it be and why?
Nick from The Demon's Lexicon, because he's so simple on the surface but has a lot of depths. I like the struggles he has with connecting to people and also with violence. I think it's something I tend to use a lot in my own characters, too.

48:If you could write the next book of any series, which one would it be, and what would you make the book about?
I feel like if I continued any of the series I like, it'd just be a fluff piece about all the characters living on to do the things I want them to :P

49:If you could write a collaboration with another author, who would it be and what would you write about?
I don't know if there are any authors I read whose style is really similar to mine, but it'd be cool to write a dark faerie tale or something with Bruce Coville or Kenneth Oppel. One of the things I really enjoyed about reading them as a child was that, although they wrote children's books, their stories had really dark themes to them as well, and they didn't leave them out for the children's sake. So the stories that I wrote at that age turned out the same way.

50:If you could live in any fictional world, which would it be?
Tortall! But it'd also be cool to live as one of the Old Ones in Susan Cooper's The Dark Is Rising sequence.
rai_ryu: (Badman)
This seemed interesting! So I think I'll do it, probably one question a week. I feel like I probably have better answers at this point than I might have earlier.

  1. Tell us about your favorite writing project/universe that you've worked with and why.

  2. What gender do you prefer to have as a protagonist? If you have no preference, what gender do you most often have as a protagonist?

  3. How do you come up with names--for characters, and for places if you're writing about fictional places?

  4. Tell us about one of your first stories/characters!

  5. By age, who is your youngest character? Oldest? How about “youngest” and “oldest” in terms of when you created them?

  6. Where are you most comfortable writing? At what time of day? Computer or good ol' pen and paper?

  7. Do you listen to music while you write? What kind? Are there any songs you like to relate/apply to your characters?

  8. What's your favorite genre to write? To read?

  9. How do you get ideas for your characters? Describe the process of creating them.

  10. What are some really weird situations your characters have been in? Everything from serious canon scenes to meme questions counts!

  11. Who is your favorite character to write? Least favorite?

  12. In what story did you feel you did the best job of worldbuilding? Any side-notes on it you'd like to share?

  13. What's your favorite culture to write, fictional or not?

  14. How do you map out locations, if needed? Do you have any to show us?

  15. Midway question! Tell us about a writer you admire, whether professional or not!

  16. Do you write romantic relationships? How do you do with those, and how “far” are you willing to go in your writing? ;)

  17. Favorite protagonist and why!

  18. Favorite antagonist and why!

  19. Favorite minor character that decided to shove themself into the spotlight and why!

  20. What are your favorite character interactions to write? (Arguments? Love scenes? Brawls?)

  21. Do any of your characters have children? How well do you write them/how comfortable do you feel writing them?

  22. Tell us about one scene between your characters that you've never written or told anyone about before! Serious or not.

  23. How long does it usually take you to complete an entire story—from planning to writing to posting/submitting for publication (if you post/submit)?

  24. How willing are you to kill your characters if the plot so demands it? What's the most interesting way you've killed someone?

  25. Do any of your characters have pets? Tell us about them.

  26. Do you draw your characters? Do others draw them? Share a drawing/some drawings of your characters, created by yourself or others! (If no one has drawn them and you can't draw, why not at least make an avatar?)

  27. Do appearances play a big role in your stories? Tell us about them, or if not, how you go about designing your characters?

  28. Have you ever written a character with physical or mental disabilities? Describe them, and if there's nothing major to speak of, tell us a few smaller ones.

  29. How often do you think about writing? Ever come across something out in the world that reminds you of your story/characters?

  30. Final question! Tag someone! And tell us what you like about that person as a writer and/or about one of his/her characters!

rai_ryu: (Aquarium)

(title related) Trying so desperately not to write these characters in a romantic relationship and yet all their feelings about each other are typically reserved for romantic pairings.
No seriously they are not lovers but pretty much the only reason they're not is because I say they're not?
Well, I really think that it's more of a matter of how our media portrays things normally. All these things are "reserved" for lovers so much that it is very hard to see friends feeling this way about each other. Maybe I'm just not articulating things well right now.

But other than the feelings the characters have, I only have the barest shreds of plot and vague characterization (other than the feelings).

The two songs that create large inspiration for this story are:
Love To The Stars - Breeze v. UFO & Lost Witness
Clarity - Zedd ft. Foxes

So that doesn't help with the fact that they're not an actual couple.

It bothers me when I have all these characters' feelings but not enough of a story to do anything about them yet. Maybe the remedy for that is just to start writing something and see how it works out. But I'm just not sure I'm prepared enough for even that yet.

Research

Jan. 30th, 2014 12:21 am
rai_ryu: (Aquarium)
Things I need to research for two upcoming stories:

Hermaphroditic sea creatures
Ballet
Different types of intersexism
Cloud formations
Composition of the moon Europa
Effects of another planet's moon blowing up
Development of transgender children who start HRT around puberty

Mostly I just needed a place to keep the list.
rai_ryu: (rainbow)
Today I woke up with Linkin Park in my head, so that's all I'm listening to apparently.

I had a strange dream where I dunno... I had a babysitter who was Pocahontas but she got accidentally killed and I had to bury her in my mom's basement, but then because she had died I had to move back in with my mom? (I'm 22 :/) Then my mom took us "out for dinner" to McDonalds, but they were closing soon so the only thing they had left was a steak sandwich which would be really gross coming from McDonalds so I told my mom I would just eat when I got home, and she got really pissed off (how surprising). That's all I remember, other than a part which took place on a roller coaster.

My book came in the mail yesterday and I'm really starting to worry that all my stories are terrible and now two of them are actually published and being inflicted on the world and it is really worrying. That's why I can't let myself read them when I get my copies of the books, because if I SEE them and they suck, then I'll know just how much of my idiocy is out there for the world to see. There are a lot of other really good stories in those anthologies! How will I ever cope when I eventually get a novel published?

I've done absolutely nothing this week, and it feels weird. I should be working on costumes for any of the 4 or 5 cons I'm going to next year. Only I don't have all the materials I need for that yet... or at least not for the parts of the costume I WANT to make. And my costume for the winter cons... I dunno what I'm gonna do about that. I'm cosplaying a genderbend of Abbey Bominable, but I'm trying to decide if I should buy a whole bunch of kids costumes and sew the costume from that (insanely expensive) or if I should paint my own fabric. Then there's the whole problem of finding tights and stuff. Gaaaah. So many things I can't really make on my own for that costume. (And I just spent like an hour looking for certain things to buy... another problem with this costume). Anyway yes, unproductiveness!

I go away on the 25th to BC to see FUN.! my favourite band ever <3 (no seriously) (I have to look at their faces every day)

This has been a pretty pointless entry, but I wanted to post something cause I haven't posted in so long.
rai_ryu: (Jeice)
Going through a giiiiant period of character obsession right now.
Once again, characters from one of my oldest stories (Coming into fruition when I was around the age of 10/in the 5th grade).
Anyway, it has grown a lot since then, and so has the universe around it.
This recent bout has been brought on by the band Fun. I am utterly useless and want to do nothing but lay around and listen to their music.

I guess what I'm really thinking is, if their music can make me feel so much about my own characters, then I want to be able to write these characters (when the story reaches its final incarnation), in a way that will inspire whoever reads it to feel about them just as deeply as I do. It's actually painful to me to think of some things about them, and I know I've felt that way about other creator's characters too, so I hope one day I'll be able to write just as well and as effectively.

I was accepted into another anthology, though editing is going slowly. This is partially due to my character melancholy, but also because this new editor is a little bit harsh. It's made the worse by the fact that this is a very personal story. I'm trying to be mature about the suggested edits and look at things objectively (it helps that I can rant to other people about how unfair said edits are, rather than sending in ill-planned letters to the editor :P)

Sometimes I wonder if when I get all these thoughts and stories and characters out of my head and sufficiently down on paper, if they'll stop doing things like this to me. But I don't really think that will happen.

Also I have developed an obsession with Nate Ruess's face.

Um, ok

May. 7th, 2012 01:56 pm
rai_ryu: (Dragonballs)
Alright LJ, I guess you're just deciding not to work in either rich text editor OR HTML editor. Sure. Whatever.
:/
Maybe I'll fix it later.

I need to go to the dollar store today so that I can work on the final parts of my costume. But WILL I? It won't even be a long trip. I'm just all iffy about leaving the house at all. Story of my life, etc.

I sort of started a new story last night. I just kind of went with it, rather than spending too much time planning of which point of view something would be from. I think I'll keep just going with it, and see how it comes out.

My room is really messy, and I know I probably should clean it before Anime North. But just not noooooow.

I'm supposed to go with my Baguette to a neurology appointment tomorrow, which should be interesting.

I really thought that I had something to say but it seems like I don't :/
rai_ryu: (Zuko Worrying)
So a couple weeks ago I applied for university. If I get in I'd be going for a BA (majoring in Classical Studies and a minor in Applied Language Studies). But apparently my dad is pissed off that I'm even going to go to school. You know, most parents would be happy that their kids wanted to go to university, but hes just mad. Apparently learning languages is so useless it doesn't even count as something productive. He thinks I should just go out and get a job instead. As if I want to be making minimum wage all my life? But he seems to think you can just go out and get a high-paying job with benefits without even having any qualifications.
And for some reason he thinks I'm only going to school so that I won't have to get a job? Yeah, cause I want to spent 5000+ dollars JUST so I won't have to get a job? It's not like I want to stay here living with him forever.
Anyway, I don't even know if I'm gonna get in. If I do he'll probably be even more angry.

In other news, I wrote a story for the upcoming asexual romance anthology, and I got accepted in! I know there's been a lot of controversy around the cover of the anthology, and I don't think it's a good choice either, but I'm still happy about getting in. I really like my story, and the anthology gave me a reason to write it, and I'm also getting paid (better than writing it and not getting paid, lol). I'm excited for the book to come out.

I'm so very close to being done my Xweetok costume! The hardest thing I have left to do is try to figure out my new ear design. Hopefully it'll work. The ears I have right now are on a headband and fall over top of my ears, but my ears themselves push them out so they don't lay flat against my head. My new design would hopefully have my ears slip inside of the foam ears, and they'd just stay on like that. But I'm not entirely sure how to work that out.

Anime north is SO CLOSE.

And I found some anime box sets for sale on RightStuf, they arrived yesterday. I got Strawberry Panic, The Soultaker, and Mirage of Blaze (a present for my Baguette!). They were all around 13-15$ each which is a really great price for an entire series.

It's going to be a busy month, but I'm so excited for Anime North.
rai_ryu: (Aquarium)

So I was in a drag show last night and I don't really think I did all that well. I'd had all these plans in my head for what I was doing, but when I was actually up performing I was all disconnected from the song and the performance so everything was really just random and lame. People said I did good, but it's not like they'd tell me if I did badly, lol.
The song I did was What Makes You Beautiful by One Direction. And all day I've been watching their video for One Thing and coming up with all these crazy shipping theories in my head. I didn't want to fall for the trap, but it seems like I have! I am terrible.
My current theories are that Zayn is head-over-heels for Louis, but Louis is only stringing him along, because he's in some sorta semi-secret relationship with Harry (but he doesn't want anything too serious). Nial is swooning for Zayn but Zayn doesn't even notice him because he's too busy with Louis. Liam is the straight one and that's fine (since he's got a girlfriend and all). See, see how terrible I am? I also still seem to think that all bands live together in a giant house.

It's kinda sad cause my Baguette's phone got disconnected so I can't text her anymore to ask how she's feeling and stuff. I get all worried, lol ^^' cause I'm sort of a sap, I guess.
But I've also been feeling all antisocial lately and I'm not sure why. I'm going to try applying for university soon, too.

I might try to submit a story to a new anthology that is coming out, but I just have to motivate myself to finish it in time (in addition to making costumes lmao). It's an anthology of asexual romance stories, and I'm not really the best at pure romance stuff, so we'll see what happens. At least I have an idea now.

My room is a terrible mess, even for me, but I'm gonna blame it on Anime North being so close. I'm working on cosplays so I can't clean! Totally the truth!
Right now my Xweetok tail is sitting on my bed and I should probably put it back in the closet so it doesn't get full of cat hairs and stuff...

Cheryl is making me call her in a bit which is irritating because I do not like the phone -_- but she always insists on it.

rai_ryu: (rainbow)

I feel like updating this but I don't think I really have anything to say, so maybe I think I'll just leave this window open and keep writing as stuff is happening.

I've got sort of a roleplay/mutual story going on with my baguette which sort of stalled around NaNoWriMo because it's not like I could write more words in a day than I absolutely HAD to. But then after that I never picked it back up because I am terrible. I told her that today I would continue it, so I guess I should, but I'm all *shies away from writing*. I guess that I've got until she comes home from school to write it though, so I can waste time with other things until then.

Last night at 1:30am I started doing a 100 piece My Little Pony puzzle. I finished it, though sadly it was missing 3 pieces so it wasn't quite as satisfying. I'm not sure why I'm in a puzzle mood. But all my puzzle boxes downstairs sound suspiciously light so I worry they're missing all their pieces.

I really should be cleaning my room. I started it earlier in the week but now it is a terrible mess. Not as bad as before the fire, of course, but still a terrible mess even by my standards. I should ALSO be working on my costume, and of course the writing. So many things I should be doing but I am not. Story of my life right?
I'm trying to work on filling up my sketchbook and doing some Art Journalling. Because I think sketchbooks like that are really cool, and I think it's also important to keep myself creating things. I don't know what I will do once my sketchbook is full, because it's one I got from the school and I'm not sure if other places carry them. It's bound like a book, with a hard black cover. I have one that is plain and one that I've stenciled the Himmel symbol onto the front of (in silver).

I'm sort of drawing pictures of chestnut trees. Which is, in a way, related to that story I'm supposed to be writing. So this is relevant work.

Painted those pictures in a bit of watercolour, but it's bothersome...I'm doing this on the back of a page that is painted black on one side. Since the watercolour soaks the paper, all it looks like is black, so I've no way to tell if my colours are working out until they dry. Eh. It's experimental anyway.Last night I had tried one of those paintings where you colour with white wax and then do a wash over it. So that just adds another dimension of strangeness to that page.

I have suuuuuch a headache. Uhg. I guess that's what I get for being up til 4am?

Ever read so much that suddenly everything you have to read seems unappealing? I read the first two Hunger Games books in maybe a week? But now I'm all overflowing with reading and I don't feel like picking up Mockingjay just yet. I'm also reading like 1000 other things but I don't feel like reading those either. I might read the ebook I'm working my way through...the Simon & Shuester PulseIt site gives you the option of 4 free ebooks every month. But you only get a set amount of time to read them. This month 2 of them actually look good, so I want to try to get both of them finished. I'm almost 2 thirds of the way through Unwound by Neal Shusterman. It's actually really good...but again I'm all put-off by reading suddenly.

I'm going cosplay shopping tomorrow FINALLY. Anime North is so close and I feel like I have nothing done. It doesn't help that a major piece of my costume is being made by someone else. I'm having a friend's mother knit a sweatervest for me, cause I couldn't find the right one anywhere. But now I feel like that part of the costume is missing.
I need to get the last few things for my Jolteon costume as well as some foam to stuff my Xweetok tail with. That should be interesting. I made a list of things I need to get but it seems like I forgot something (even though I couldn't possibly have).

I think I'm gonna end this journal now cause it's already long and basically is just rambling.
rai_ryu: (Enre)
I'm a fan of online "quizzes" or "surveys". And I'm also a fan of rambling about my characters. So it kind of goes without saying that I find filling out character sheets a very appealing idea.
However, a lot of sheets that I've found don't apply to quite a few of my characters.
Now sometimes, I can attribute it to not being far enough along in their individual character building to answer some of the questions. I don't know their taste in music, or their favourite food, or how they feel about their hometown. It's hard for me to not to just fill in the first answer that comes into mind for those questions (Or else all my characters would be into radio music, bread and stew, and be indifferent about their hometowns). Those are the situations where I need to think about this character in depth.

But other times, the questions really don't apply.
For instance, my characters who are currently slaves aren't in the position to have a taste in music or a favourite food, and they've probably moved around too much and been kept in such a controlled area that they have no notion of a "hometown".
Other times it is more in-depth questions that don't apply to my characters. I've gained a new character lately who has a past she's trying to get away from. I realized that when I came to the conclusion she was living under an assumed name (Because really, nobody would name their kid Riven Riviera).
She's one of the main characters, so I need to have her pretty much down. Character sheets, right? Wrong.
I can't answer any questions about her past. It isn't that I'm too lazy to think it up. She doesn't want to tell me; as far as she's concerned, she has no past. So I can't push, or else I feel I'll be contriving something.
The other main character of the story was created artificially as an adult (though she doesn't know it). She can't recall much of her past, maybe a few passing memories but nothing concrete. No experiences, no family ties or christmas mornings. Certainly not a hometown. She just thinks she has a bad memory. But there really is nothing to fill out.

Still, other times, the information is impertinent. Sometimes it doesn't matter what someone's favourite food was. And the deep sexual desires of characters are frankly never involved in my stories. Not that all of my characters are asexual, but any information about what they prefer or not in the bedroom just isn't relevant.

So I'm stuck for ways to try to get to know them. To me, it seems that character sheets are best for giving you ideas of what you need to learn about your character. I always find them more fun to fill out when I already KNOW a character.

Right now I am trying to write some behind-the-scenes stories featuring Miss Riven Riviera so I can see what she's like in day-to-day life. Then, hopefully, I can write her as an individual within the setting of the story.
rai_ryu: (Default)
I've not updated in a while. Lots of things have happened (or maybe not lots, but big things?)

My trip to St. Catharines went amazingly well. I didn't even get antisocial, which is shocking. I can still almost not believe I met my friend Devin finally. Even though we were meeting for the first time, for some reason I felt like I'd known him for years (ok, well I have, but it felt like I'd been around him for years). I also met my new friend Mandy and we went to the best Haunted House I've ever been through in my life. It was so scary I almost don't want to go back through.

I got my spot in the Writers' Workshop with Kenneth Oppel. I mean, I didn't doubt I would, since I called minutes after registration opened. But things are full now, it seems. I am nervous about going.
I don't know the range of people who are going to be at this thing. I'm hoping there will be some people around my age. Furthermore, as he is a Beloved Childhood Author, I am afraid I will fail him or freak him out. The range of subject matter allowed will have to be gauged while I am there, I suppose.
I am also very nervous because I'm sure we will have to read our writing aloud. I am not eloquent aloud, that is precisely why I write. In school, I wrote amazing speeches, but I was not confident to read the words I had on the page. I was always afraid what people would think. So I glossed over. I'm afraid that will happen again, but also just as afraid that it won't.

All the snow had melted, and then I woke up this morning to a foot of snow on the ground. And it didn't stop pelting all day. I went to the library with Cheryl and we tried to get bubble tea, but the shop was closed even though it shouldn't have been. That means there was no bubble tea this week ):

I really need to clean my room, but...I am lazy. I might do it tomorrow, but I might not.
I picked up two video games last week. Zelda:Phantom Hourglass (which I finally caved and got, because I found a copy under 30$), and Rule Of Rose which I needed to buy, just because I was sure I'd never see it for sale again. I like it so far (my little sister forbids me to play it when she's not around). But I am always worried something really weird will come up when my dad is watching me play. I know it was banned because of something to do with lesbianism? But I don't know under what specific circumstances it happens.
rai_ryu: (Alan<3)
My sewing machine is fixed! I had to sop up all the oil the guy added to it, but it is in just as good a working order as it was before it broke. I guess it stands to good reason that it jams so much because the inner workings are all plastic.

In any case, I finished the fly for my pants. I completely improvise with how to do it, and think it turned out as it should have. Very good for my first time, at least. Waistband got on with only minor problems, but I didn't have to stitchrip it (although I did accidentally sew the fly closed at one point, and had to fix that ^^'). They are slightly loose, I suppose. But with a belt it should be fine.
Tomorrow I will work on belt loops, or possibly attaching the button to the front (Or both?!). I think I've found a way to make the buttonhole function on my machine actually work. At least, with it newly repaired, it's as good a time as any.

Realized I might have to seriously re-order things in FMM and it's making me feel overwhelmed. I feel I introduce a certain important event too early, but maybe not. If I could get someone to read it and tell me what they think, that would be helpful. But like that will happen!
So yes, I am taking a little break and writing some short stories and focusing on just writing for myself, without worrying if things are in the right order :P

I just started chapter 2 of Villains By Necessity by Eve Forward. Very pleased so far. It's worth the 40.50$ I paid for it, in any case. Better than the 70$ I originally saw it priced as. But I am striving to take very very good care of it, because it does count as a rare book.

I have school tomorrow, and I do believe that none of my clothes are clean. Ah well, I will figure something out.
I have had the urge lately to get a mohawk again. In related news, I'm trying to think of my drag persona (or if I even have the courage to do a drag performance on my own!). Trying to think of how to construct a believable fake goatee, that can be easily applied and saved for another use. I have some hairs left over from when I first cut off my emo bangs way back when I first shaved my head.

I feel like I am so many different people, but I don't know how to be all of them at once :/
rai_ryu: (Jeice)
I told myself I would go to bed at a proper hour tonight, but lo and behold, it is 3:19 and here I am.

Last few days have been an unproductive blur - staying up too late, sleeping too late, and not having the energy to work on things that need to be worked on. I will have to get myself in gear tomorrow at least, because as AN draws nearer, I am going to have to be helping others with their costumes, so I should have made significant progress on mine.
But I am afraid of the fly and the waistband.

I've wanted to write, I know I have. But I just realized I'm going to have to re-write some parts of FMM, and possibly even plan out what the hell is happening. Things are moving much too fast, I think. But I also have to consider whether or not that is really true. I don't know. Help me?
In any case, I started a short story I've been thinking of tonight. I'm glad for a change of scenery from my novel. I will finish it. Tomorrow will be productive, one way or another.

Fairly large antisocial streak going on right now. Always apearring offline on MSN. Oddly though, I've joined OKCupid and sent out some messages (fairly unheard of for me). Don't even know what I'm looking for, but at least it might be possible for me to make friends. If I don't get tired of making friends. Haven't been to Acebook in ages, makes me wonder why I am so intensely antisocial right now. Maybe I am not cut out for human relationships.

I've finally moved my music from the downstairs computer up here onto my own. It's all old stuff, ever since grade 9 (and possibly even earlier). Brings up a lot of old feelings, memories. So many romantic songs that make me yearn desperatly for somebody. But I think that is part of my problem - I talk to someone, listen to romantic songs and automatically envision "them". But I probably don't like them. I don't know. My feelings fluctuate, things aren't always what they seem.

Might get to see one of my exes in person for the first time. I'm excited and nervous. Probably at the end of february, though nothing is really planned yet. Did I mention this before? Too lazy to go and check.

I will be productive tomorrow. I will be productive tomorrow. I will...
rai_ryu: (Enre)
So, I already have my one goal for this year: Get my jacket finished by the end of January, and get the rest of the costume finished by AN (of course).

But...should I be so bold to...have the goal to finish this draft of my novel by 2012? Sh-should I be so bold?
Considering the substantial lack of progress I've made on it lately, it seems not probably to be achieved, but if I made the goal, perhaps it would motivate me?
I need to dedicate some good time to thinking about this fricken' story first. I decided I wanted it to have more plot points, since the first one is much too short and there's not enough buildup. However, when I made this plan, I forgot to specify what these plot points were. Thinking, thinking and envisioning things is required.

In other news, I keep going to bed far too late. I'm surprised I woke up before noon today.

I'm waiting for a book in the mail. It had better come. I finally caved and bought a copy of Villains by Necessity by Eve Forward.
But I have bad luck with having things delivered to me...

Costuming today. Think I will finally make the epaulets. Maybe the rank bar too. And then writing tonight - because it really just is procrastination.
rai_ryu: (envy)
On that thing with the writing topics.

I'm watching Bones right now...the first time I've ever watched it. It's hilarious! I might get around to watching more of it.

The new season of Pretty Little Liars started. Emily came out to her parents...I know, I'm not generally interested in the show for the side-plots, but that one kept me curious. To me being outed or coming out doesn't seem like such a big deal - maybe its just because of my own experience, but even if your parents are mad at you they will get over it.
Although right now the whole "A" thing seems pretty overblown. Like the later seasons of Prison Break. Or maybe I'm just becoming disgusted by the Mr. Fitz storyline.

I've been working on my costume a lot lately...trying to get the jacket finished by the end of the month. I'm just adding the trim and then the epaulets (which I'm having to make separatly because they're going to be detachable so I can dress as other characters without having to unstitch things). The trim is annoying me right now because I might not be doing certain parts right (namely the corners). I'll go back to work on it tomorrow.

I've been playing a lot of Legend of Dragoon lately, I restarted it a little while ago. I'm almost to the part where I was before!
It's been freezing every so often, Cassy was going to lend me her PS1 so that it would work, but she can't find all the cords yet.
I need to remember to also play FF8 so I don't forget where I am.

I wrote some of my novel today - exciting! because I have hardly written anything in the longest time. Probably didn't amount to much but that's alright. I'm writing a scene now that I know has to be there, I'm just not sure about WHEN its supposed to be. I might as well do it now then I can just stick it in wherever it needs to be.

For some reason I keep getting the feeling that there's something I really wanna do, but whenever I do something that's just not it...
rai_ryu: (Alan<3)
You know something I hate? When websites are SO CONCERNED for your account safety that they force you to add crazy combinations of capital letters, symbols and numbers into your password. The result is something you could never remember, and would have to write down anyway - taking away any percieved benefit to account security! I'm sorry, website, but I really don't care THAT much about my account, although you seem to.

*ahem*

I said I was going to do things today but now that it is today, I don't know what to do. I want to write, but I am not sure about it. I don't want to turn out some more crap (though if I actually start writing, chances are it will turn out fine).
I am thinking of submitting something to a new magazine which is starting, but I am also unsure because I don't know which pieces of mine are applicable or good enough to go. A writer who I admire/am a big fan of actually replied to my comment concerning this, so I feel I must at least give it a try.

I finally finished Genesis. I'm hoping there will be less offspring-lists in the following books, but all in all I enjoyed it. Usually when I start reading something, the bookmark moves through the pages with great speed. Not really so with the bible. I have read so much and made very little progress at all!

My arms hurt because I was cutting things up all yesterday. My bottle seems to have been stuck at the same level for ages, though I've increased my quota. Filling the last little bit is always the hardest, because it doesn't mix as well, and the contents keep settling.
I've already started collecting stuff for my next bottle. I don't know if I'll go back to using small ones, or keep up with the giant bottles. The small ones are easier to store, but I worry it will not feel as satisfying after having one as big as my forearm.

People have suggested that after this one I start making a bottle of each colour. It sounds interesting, but it is really hard for me to cut things of the same colour up over and over.
I told myself I wouldn't cut things today, so I need to find SOMETHING else to do!

Themes

Nov. 9th, 2010 02:19 pm
rai_ryu: (Jeice)
I just read this article: http://hollylisle.com/index.php/Feature-Stories/finding-your-themes.html
And it got me wondering what my most prevalent themes were. This is just for fun and because I'm procrastinating, but here are my answers (mostly in the form of questions). Themes that make my mind race to create answers - and as many different answers as possible.

Truth:
The perception of truth and the lies people tell (Why do they tell them? Are their reasons good or bad? Is any reason ever good? Is any reason ever bad?). Is truth a constant or does it change based on whose viewpoint it’s seen from? If truth is constant, is it constantly constant?

Good and Evil:
Do they exist? Should they exist? The way one person sees something is not the way another sees it. Can someone who does bad things be good? Can someone who does good things be bad? Does evil come from the actions, or the mind?

Love:
There are countless different kinds of love. All of them are love. Which kind of love outweighs another? Is it good for one to outweigh another? What decides if it is good or not? Should one always listen to the heart? What if the heart has two answers? When it breaks, can it mend? Sometimes people must choose between loves. What motivates people to choose one or the other? How do they live with these choices? What are the outcomes, both in actions and emotions?

Power:
Who has power, how is it shown? Can a personal power raise one from oppression? Are orders to be followed or challenged? Does the answer to this change depending on the order? Depending on who is giving it? Can “following orders” be justified as an excuse – both inside the mind or by the outside world? How are other people controlled into doing something they don’t want to do, or doing something against the morals? What has power over people – other people, God, emotions, duties, responsibilities and perceptions? Is a power absolute?

I could go on and on in answer to these questions, and no doubt I would come up with different answers each time. This is really getting my juices flowing, so I'm going to go try to finish a scene before Dr. Phil comes on.
rai_ryu: (Nick<3)
I cleaned my room a little today, but it doesn't look much different. I DID however, find the notebook in which I am writing my novel.

I've kind of been ignoring it for a long while because, I just wrote a passage that is really, really crappy.
As bad as I am at writing battle scenes (in my opinion, at least), I thought it was going well. But then I switched over to Jeice's POV. It is the first time I've written him in battle, but it is not the first time he's BEEN in a battle situation. Unfortunatly, I seemed to have forgotten that.

Now I get that battle is chaotic, and that within this battle Jeice has to deal with his best friend getting horribly injured. But somehow, I managed to stray from Jeice's character and make him terrified of everything.
He loses his cool. He freezes up and gets confused at everything around him. He hardly even fights. Uhg! It grosses me out so much!

When I ran into this problem with Enre, I physically got into character as her, and acted out the scene in question to find out how she really would react, and how she would feel.
And I would do this with Jeice.
But I am so reluctant to go back and read that passage I wrote! I should just cross it out, and start all over. But I'm afraid of staring at my own failure on the page. Of having to read it over to understand what scene I'm at. I know I will HAVE to, just, when will I bring myself to actually do it?

I'm also worried because, there are so many things I want to explore in this new version of the novel. I just worry I will not have the space to put them, or I will not be able to expand the plot enough to allow a moment for them. I worry that once this version is done, I will have to come out with a THIRD.

Sometimes I wonder if I should let this one rest for a while, and start up another novel I've been meaning to write. But I look at the others on my list and realize that I'd be more lost trying to start those than I am trying to work through this one. So that's what I'm left with.

I do however, enjoy writing vignettes of my characters' lives. And if they suck I don't even have to post them online!

Other than that, still playing Lux-Pain, which I am still enjoying very much.
Also, I am almost finished watching Evangelion. It got...really weird. I am simultaneously enjoying it and not enjoying it. Although, I want to see Kaworu expanded more, so I'm thinking of reading the manga.
I know he is supposed to be creepy but I think him and Shinji are really cute together.

I'll stop rambling on, maybe go do something.
rai_ryu: (Default)
First of all, those new LJ ads are annoying.
But that goes without saying.

I had considered doing NaNoWriMo but I just don't think I have it in me. One of my biggest problems to begin with is low word count, since I always seem to be more concise than is reasonable (and at other times spend a painstaking amount of time describing things that are not at all important). Then there was the problem of thinking if I'd want to start with an idea I already have for something, or come up with an entirely new one just for the occasion.
I feel bad that I have so many characters whose stories should be told, and yet I am making a very very small amount of progress on any of them. I have to face the facts that I will die one day, and it will be a terrible thing if they die with me.

I need to post on my RP with Cassy (after probably 4 months of not doing so), because I've figured the story and it goes on past there. I was wondering whether or not to make it canon within my world, and I think I've settled on semi-canon (depending on how things go). Because a search party containing Taqu and Oura IS sent out to find Himmel. And certain things DO happen when they meet him. And he is not, in fact, dead.

I feel a lack of motivation to do much of anything lately, but that is nothing new. In every single journal I have I ramble about this and it is just lame. Obviously the answer is "do things" and stop whining about it.

I started watching the new season of Dexter, which is very sad and just as affecting as usual. It might be a scary thing how much I identify with him. In other news, I wonder if other people who watch the show actually give a crap about the drama they like to place the other characters in? I don't CARE about Battista and LaGuarda's relationship. I don't care about the newest person Deb is banging (can she work with someone and NOT sleep with them?). Though I do find it infinitly amusing that her and Dexter are married in real life.

My halloween costume was finished in time and came out reasonably well. Now I have to get back to work on my Roy costume for Anime North. I keep putting it off, but the convention is only 6months 24days away, and I really don't want to end up rushing.
"But Rai, over six months should be enough to finish one costume"
But how do you KNOW? I am dreading the pants because I have never, in my whole life, made a decent pair of pants. NEVER. And this is Roy we're talking about, I can't make him look stupid!

In other news, my graduation ceremony is this weekend and I really don't want to go. I'm going to have to encounter all my classmates and I didn't like dealing with them when we were in class together. Why should I have to do it now that I'm free from that place? ARG

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