Writer's Block: Back to the future

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If my 12 year old self saw that I was, in fact, still here, I think they would be upset. It would mean my "delusions" of somehow travelling into another dimension had not yet come through. They might, however, be pleased to see that I'm not still trapped in my mother's house, and despite everything that's gone on since I left, I became so much more happier. I think that would give them relief.
They might also be disappointed that I did not remain faithful to a certain someone for all of eternity, but I think they might grow to understand about that.

As for other things, I can't really comment on whether I'd be happy about where I am now, as my younger self never thought about having a future here.

FMM and gayness

For those of you who aren't familliar with the story, Enre, the main character of my novel is a lesbian. The interesting bit is that she is one of my few characters that actually identifies herself AS a lesbian (and that I also identify as a lesbian). Of course, as the time where the story takes place she doesn't know a word for it. Other female characters that I've had who end up dating women just end up doing so without being lesbians (or without being LGBTQ either). Often they just happen to fall for women (this happened quite frequently after my roleplay partner turned ALL OF HER CHARACTERS INTO LESBIANS) without being attracted to them sexually.
Anyway, since Enre is so firmly identified as a lesbian in MY mind, I've always thought "Oh this story has gay themes in it", because I thought that having a main character who is gay means the book deals with gayness. But is that actually true?
I'm not really one for pushing "gay issues" into books where they are not supposed to be the focus of the story. This would also be especially hard in FMM since her lover dies in the first chapter, and she spends the majority of the following chapters with everyone thinking she's a male. Does it matter that she was gay? Not really. I mean, she just is, so its not really a point that needs to be focused on, if that makes sense.

Because I need to know Enre pre-post-FMM better, I got to thinking about how the whole lesbian thing played into her life beforehand. Before Melanie showed up, I don't think she realized anything was different about herself. She wasn't interested in dating, but just figured it was because she was focused on other things (and hey, she was). After Melanie showed up, Enre just acted as came naturally to her, though at first they both questioned what was building between them because of their Christian upbringing. But, as is obvious, it didn't stop them. After they became a couple, they even still went to church (Enre only stopped thinking of herself as deserving to be a Christian after she killed somebody). So a lot of the internat struggle that these "gay issues" stories include is absent from their lives. As for Melanie, she already "rebelled" against a lot of expectations for a woman of her position, so I'm pretty sure she thought nothing of her lesbian relationship.

What about the villagers, though? They MUST have shunned her for being different, or made accusations about the relationship, right? Let me tell you, there were many theories about Enre; none of them were about her being a lesbian. A quick rundown of Enre's history: Her mother died during childbirth, and was quickly followed by her father who commited suicide. She was left in the care of her uncle. As a kid, she worked on the farm so didn't have a lot of time to be a girly girl (not that she was a tomboy, since I realize that's very stereotypical, it was really out of necessity since its hard to work in dresses). Her uncle died when she was 14, and afterward she kept the up the farm on her own (sometimes with some help from others in the village).
People generally thought her not dating was based on her mourning for her uncle, where they pegged down her unladylikeness to her having to take care of the farm (which was true). She'd often tell them it was the only thing she had left of her family, and so she'd wanted to keep it that way, which was her reason for not letting someone else take it over, or moving in with another household.
When Melanie came along everyone was too happy that Enre was actually interacting with someone to consider what their relationship might be. Melanie encouraged Enre to be more outgoing with the rest of the community so they probably saw her as a good influence (despite the arguably disgraceful circumstances with which she arrived in town).
Her and Enre didn't act on their relationship in public, because of course, as Christians, they knew it wasn't necessarily supported by the bible. They appeared as close friends, which they were, of course. Not being able to kiss in public didn't bother them, though, so they didn't feel surpressed. It was just the way things were, in their minds. They could even hold hands and whatnot, since you know, girls do that all the time (apparently)
So that's another thing common to "gay issues" that Enre (and Melanie) didn't experience.
It also should be mentioned that the other relationships in the book are hetero (which isn't surprising, based on the setting and the fact that gays ARE a minority). People love to read into books though, and might think I'm pushing aside the gay relationship (since Melanie dies) in favour of straight ones. Obviously I have no intention of changing how the story goes in order to stop people from making weird assumptions, though. Its not as if Enre isn't a lesbian just because her lover died. And stories where every character is gay are unrealistic and annoy me to some extent.
In addition, the romantic relationships in FMM are secondary (maybe even tertiary). They play a lot into the characters' reasons for doing what they do (Chance joined to army to pay for his wedding, for example. And Jeice's marriage to Leah is implied to have had an influence over him finally deciding to start the rebellion), but the story is NOT about romance or romantic relationships. Its about different things altogether.

Do you think its more important to touch upon these issues, or to display a person's sexual orientation as just being another part of their character? If you are LGBTQ, would a story featuring a gay character which does NOT touch on these issues be less appealing to you? How do you feel about how the gay populous is portrayed in novels (being a minority vs. a majority)? I am wondering because the way I percieve things might be vastly different from how others do.
Personally I'm a little tired of the obligatory "I am gay so everyone hates me" stance that a lot of "LGBTQ books" take.

Also a note on Enre's dressing as a man, even though I've already touched on this a lot: It is all based on comfort and functionality, not because she wants to be a boy or more manly etc. Enre identifies as female. When she goes undercover as a man, it is only so she's actually allowed to join the army. In the future, Enre's style of dress is very unimportant to her so she just wears simple jeans and t-shirt (under her armor, of course, which she wears for quite a different reason).

Anyway, this post was mostly for my own benefit, but I thought it could strike up some good conversation if anyone is reading/if anyone comments.

I am also planning another book in the future that includes a character who is asexual (it is revealed in the book, so I do have to mention it outright), but am thinking of ways that I can do that without it turning into "this is a pamphlet on asexuality, with some plot around it". He isn't even THE main character, so I would hate to have his orientation become the focus of the novel.