Big and Long

Well, I've got a whole bunch of things to say...so this journal will be big and long. I wasn't talking about one of those scary things >_<

So
Today was sposed to be my sad emo day, because its the two-year anniversary of when Cassy broke up with me. I don't really feel like being sad and emo though, so, I probly won't :D
However, I'm gonna post the lyrics to an emo song. Really, the guy who sings this sounds so emo, but I love this song XD
ew, but he doesn't sound as emo as Gary Jules *pukes*
here we go~

Konstantine - by Something Corperate

I can't imagine all the people that you know
And the places that you go
When the lights are turned down low
And I don't understand
All the things you've seen
But I'm slipping in between
You and your big... dreams
it's always you, in my big dreams

And you tell me
That it's over
Wake up lying in a patch of four leaf clover
And you're restless
And I'm naked
You've got to get out
You can't stand to see me shaking
no, could you let me go
I didn't think so

and you don't want to be here in the future
So you say
the present's just a pleasant
Interruption to the past
And you don't want to look much closer
'Cause you're afraid to find out all this hope
You had sent into the sky by now had... crashed
and it did, because of me

And then you bring me home
Afraid to find out that you're alone, no
And I'm sleeping in your living room
But we don't have much room
To live

I had these dreams, in them I learned to play guitar
Maybe cross the country
Become a rockstar
And there was hope in me
That I could take you there
But damn it you're so young
But I don't think I care
and if I hurt you then i'm sorry
Its just this guilt has got the best of me

And then you bring me home
'Cause we both know what it's like to be alone, no
And I'm dreaming in your living room
But we don't have much room
To live

And Konstantine is walking down the stairs
Doesn't she look good
Standing in her underwear?
And I was thinking, what I was thinking you know?
But she's been drinking
And it doesn't get me anywhere

My Konstantine came walking down the stairs
And all that I could do
Was touch her long blonde hair
And I've been thinking, what I was thinking you know?
But we've been drinking
And it doesn't get me anywhere

This is because I can spell konfusion with a K
And I can like it
It's to dying in anothers arms
and why i had to try it
It's to jimmy eat world
and those nights in my car
But this time I'm alone
And I don't see those stars
I'm not your star
Isn't that what you said?
what you thought this song meant
you thought this song meant...

And if this is what it takes
just to lie with my mistakes
and live with what I did to you
All the hell I put you through
I always catch the clock it's 11:11
And now you want to talk
it's not hard to dream
You'll always be my Konstantine
My Konstantine

They'll never hurt you like I do
No, They'll never hurt you like I do
No, No, No, No, No, No, No, No, No

This is to a girl who got into my head
with all the pretty things she did
Hey, You know, you keep me up in bed
This is to a girl who got into my head
with all these fucked up things I did
Hey maybe baby, you could keep me up in bed
My Konstantine

Spin around me like a dream
We played out on this movie screen
And I said,
Did you know I miss you
Did you know I miss you
Did you know I miss you
Did you know I miss you
Did you know I miss you
Did you know I miss you
Did you know I miss you

I miss you

And then you bring me home
And we'll go to sleep but this time not alone, no No,
And then you'll kiss me in your living room, oh
And you see, no
That I've been missing in my living room
yeah this is what I missed, what I missed
We don't have much room
I said, does anybody need that room?
Because we all need a little more room
To live

...My Konstantine.


:D its a pretty cool song...<3
Actually, I couldn't seem to find lyrics that matched the version I've been listening to :/ artists always seem to change the lyrics when they sing them live, don't they?

oki doke, next item on the agenda!
I was watching Halloween: H20 last night XD
I love the Hallween movies, and especially Michael Meyers <333
But it got me thinking as to why Michael makes a perfect killer. You know, not just cause he can kill people, but other reasons that make him scary, y'know? I say 'you know' too much.
ANYWAY

1- The Mask - He wears a mask, so his facial expression never changes. I heard this described once on an episode of Law & Order. The victim is trying to find some clue as to how they can make the killer stop, but if they can't read his emotions because of the mask, they have to clues to what he's thinking.

2- Silence - Michael doesn't talk at all. He doesn't laugh, sing, I don't think I've ever heard him make a sound vocally, actually. This goes with the same theory as above, only using vocal clues instead of facial expressions.

3- Consistancy - He doesn't seem to change at all. Doesn't really get angry or anything. He's always just calmly walking towards you at a steady, even, pace. This makes him seem a lot less human. He'll just go towards his goal no matter what happens.

But, in H20, the dude who played Michael really sucked. Seriously, he couldn't get Michael's walk right at all. He walked slightly like one of those gangsta people >_<
H20 is actually one of the sissiest Halloween movies. Michael only killed...two people. UHG. Three people died all together, but the other guy was shot by the other ppl who thought he was Michael. Losers. And Michael got all mad and was throwing around tables. Great, now it looks like an episode of Cops.
The other ones I've seen were much better. Except for #3. Which sucked ass. Seriously, Michael wasn't even in it.
I could rant forever about that movie.

Umm, next topic then, I guess.
The next topic is sex.
ew
Cause I've been thinking about reasons why I don't like sex, you know, other than just not liking it.
This is gonna be a little hard to explain.
These aren't really in any order.

For one, I don't exactly get 'turned on' :/
I went with calling myself 'asexual' for a while, but that bothered people more than me saying I was gay -_- I don't really see why its so confusing for them...jeez.
So, even though I'm gay, I don't look at a naked girl and get turned on. I mean, come on people, she's ONLY naked. This goes with my famous quote of "So if there was just a boob lying there, you'd get turned on cause it was a boob?"
yeah. But really, grow up people. its just a naked person, no need to get all excited.
Sure, naked girls look good. Very good. But that's good to my eyes, not my crotch.

And here's another thing, when I was growing up, all that was on TV was those 'lovers lane' stories where the guy is always pressuring the girl to have sex (lol, maybe this is also why I'm a lesbian). I figured guys were jerks because they always made girls have sex, and that's not what girls want.
But nowdays everyone's pressuring everyone to have sex, it seems. I good example is the show Friends. I like that show, its funny, but all of them had slept with eachother, it seems. And they all have sex with everyone all the time.
Ok, maybe not that extreme.
But sex is so casual now, it doesn't mean anything. Now its like, you're not normal if you DON'T have sex. Its like, 'seriously, what's wrong with you?'
Now I'm getting rambly, but whatever.
I hate it how everything has to be about sex. They say stuff like "Its the most fun you can have with your clothes on!". But really, there are millions of things in thise world better/more fun than sex.
And how, two people, like, in movies, always have to end up having sex. They can't just kiss, no, they have to have sex. And even in real life. Can't you just, sleep beside the person you love? Why does it have to turn sexual at all? It seems so cheap now, there really isn't any point. I've said this before, that in a world will people will sleep with just anyone, just to satisfy their body, how can you think sex is special anymore? Don't try to justify it to me by saying its a way to show your love. Show your love my making the person into the big crowd of people who have sex? Turning them just into another 'anybody'. In my opinion, its far more special NOT to have sex with someone. It shows that you don't see them as just something to pleasure yourself with. Yes, I would rather kiss you than make out.
And sex also seems a little cheesy or stupid too. Example, in movies, they seem to have sex at the drop of a scarf.
The movie Underworld: Evolution will be my first example. Don't get me wrong, I love that movie. But here we go...when Selene and the dude (sorry man, forgot your name...was it Michael?) were in the garage kinda box thingy, he goes to tend to her wound and she's like 'Michael, its alright' and he looks and her wound is healed (duh, she's a vampire). And then they start making out. Like, wtf? So its like "Oh, you're healed? Lets have sex"
Seriously, what's even remotly sexy in that part? "You're not injured? That turns my on soooo much!". That sex scene didn't bother me that much though, because they make an awesome couple, and they love eachother so much. But still, dudes, its was corny! LOSERS. And also, at the end, they kill the guys, then start making out. 'We just killed them, lets make out!' while there's blood and guts everywhere. Yeah. Romantic. Sure. But really, how do people get turned on at random times like that?
And the movie, History Of Violence (crappy movie, btw, don't waste your money on it). First sex scene. The dude's wife says "we never got to be teenagers together, I'm gonna change that". You can tell its gonna be stupid. They get home and she dresses up like a cheerleader. Yes, cheerleader outfits are very cute. But the dude doesn't see anything wrong with his wife being dressed like a highschool student? He must be like, 40 or something, his hair's already going grey, and she's dressed like a highschool student. Creepy. And then she does some stupid cheer, and jumps on him. Actually, it looked kinda painful. Anyway, fast forward a bit, and he pulls off her underwear (white lacy thong I think. Jeez lady, you're old, get over it. I'll rant about thongs later). And he whirls it around and says "ta ra ra boom dee aye~". Seriously, get a grip dude. How could you possibly stay turned on after something as corny as that, lady? But, they have sex anyway. He says something like "I never knew I'd have a wife like this" and she says "No wives here, buddy". Ok, if all the other stupid stuff before that didn't stop you, that should. What, you're not my wife? Then why the hell am I having sex with you? Seriously, it pissed me off. WHY would he not want to think of her as his wife? Seriously, why?
Next sex scene starts like: She's found out about his violent past, and she's yelling at him and crying, and she's scared of him, right? And she slaps him a whole lot, and she's trying to get up the stairs, but he's grabbing her leg and pulling her down. He succeeds in pulling her down and he's on top of her. I was like 'oh god, he's gonna rape her'. But guess what? Crazy Lady grabs his head and starts making out with him. Yes. A second ago you were scared of him, lady, you were both trying to kill eachother. And now you're making out. And so he pulls off her underwear and they have sex on the stairs. That would probly be rather uncomfortable. I wish they would have fallen down the stairs, that woulda been funny.
But its just like, the slightest things turn people on these days, at least in movies. And its stupid and cheesy and really, they're just losers.
typical scene:
Lady: *walks into shoe store and sees a hot clerk guy*
Hot Clerk Guy: May I help you?
Lady: *smiles slightly embarassed about her fantasies* Yes, I'm looking for a pair of shoes
*they go over to the shoes*
HCG: *helps her try on a pair* How are those?
Lady: Those aren't my size
*they have sex*

Well really. 'Those shoes aren't your size? Lets have sex!"
UHG.

More things wrong with sex...
Well, there's more, but I'm bored of this topic now. So I'll move onto the next, thongs. lol.
Really, what's sexy about a thong? Its just an eternal wedgie. 'Your underwear is shoved up your ass? How sexy' seriosuly folks, it looks damn uncomfortable too.
http://www.streetcarparty.com/photogallery/boozecruises/2003mardgras/images/thong.jpg
http://www.gazette.uwo.ca/.%2F2005%2F02%20february%2F10%2Fscans%2F01b%20thong.png
They leave me thinking, OUCH that wedgie must hurt. Plus, there's nothing there. They're hardly made of ANYTHING. They're like...having a bra that only consists of the straps.
In my opinion, panties look much better. lmao.
But really, they're cute. They're totally more cool than thongs.
http://www.phenster.com/template-images/a13-journal-images/panties/panties-gorge-2.jpg
They're cute, and they don't look like the girl just got wedgied by every member of the football team at the same time. Those girls in the thong pictures, really, it was like, they had toilet paper stuck up their butts but it was their underwear.


Hm, what else can I rant about?
Other than that Cassy totally sucks. LOSER.
Going back to my previous thing about cheesy sex, here's Cassy's version:
'There's a large group of people here, lets have sex!'
You suck dude. Totally.

Hm...
Now, I gotta think of things to do other than the chores I'm sposed to...