Why...?

I'm starting to want to go back...
I don't know why...
Because I've got so much to leave behind here. That I don't WANT to leave behind.
But something keeps dragging my mind to what I had there....
If only there was a way, I could be both places...

It's not like...

It's not like I really miss you, Drayc.
I can hardly remember the times we were together...
I could hardly remember them back then too. Is that why you gave up, then...?
Demona's been talking to me. I think she knows, my Youkai self wants to come back.
You're still not talking, Drayc. So if you really wanted me back, you're blowing it.
Maybe we should talk.
Because, I need to tell you...I need to tell you that I can't, not anymore, I can't leave here for you.
My Youkai self is being pulled back to Maten, but Drayc, no, I can't.

I need to stay here now. Even if I am, a nothing. I have no rank. I have no abilities. Nothing makes me stand out. And yet, I am. I am something to her. I have something. Someone. Even if I'm no one.
I never had you, Drayc. I had your voice. And then I had your memories. Your sorrow. Longing. Begging.
But you didn't listen.
So why is it that you always start coming back when I find someone...?
Are you jealous?
You have no right to be, Drayc. It's your fault. If you wanted to be with me, you never should have left back then. I know I couldn't keep my promise to you, but what makes you think I'd keep it now?
Why do you think you can just come back and I'll go running to you?
Why? Tell me.

I know, you won't. You still won't talk. You won't come back.
"I am here."
did you just say that?
You said it back then too, Drayc.
And you left right after.
It will always be like that with you.

Which is why, I'm with her.